Friday, April 07, 2006

A look at my current spirituality...

I know, I know, another long one. Oh well. The original form of this piece was in an email response to a good friend. The quotes are from his initial email to me.

I always appreciate discussing things with you as well. Your perspectives challenge and support mine and I feel that afterwards I have stepped forward. You speak of looking for something to hang your uncertainty on and not finding it. I appreciate that perspective. I think for me, though I've moved past the standard church orthodoxy, and don't know what to make of God or Jesus, I seem to have come to a place where, most of the time, I hang my uncertainty. I don't really know what the hook it's hanging on is though! ;) The idea of God revealing itself to us, to me, is very appealing. The idea of a God who has a personal interest in me is also quite attractive. Is it true or right?

Hmmmm. And on a little side note after having read Guns,Germs,and Steel and becoming more aware of how evolution would shape things I also wonder what features allowed for certain faiths to become dominant. What is it about Islam, Christianity, and Judaisim that allowed them to become the dominant influences and beliefs in the Western world? How about the Taoist influence in the East? Anyhoo....

I do think that God reveals itself and for people to understand this they put it into ways they can grasp it. Their faith systems. Perhaps some set-ups allow an easier access into awareness. Is there a common factor found amongst many of the prophets and preachers? The many Holy People? Jesus, Buddha, Mohammed, Ghandi, The Dalai Lama? I think our terms are so very limited in any discussion of this nature. Is God personal or impersonal? So limited. Often I think the answer lies in both and more; in fullness. Just as we are individually I and corporately We at the same time. We are not one or the other but both. I believe that many of the parameters surrounding the questions of God are too narrowly defined.

When I read "any attempt to know the unknowable is doomed to failure" I think yes and no. What is failure? Is it not gaining knowledge? In that is it not success? Is this not journey towards "God" as we realize that it is more that we think.. not more as in different.. but more as in deeper. This sentence could also speak of the inability for us to FULLY know God? As our words are insufficient to contain the experiences so our experiences are insufficient to the reality of God. Our understanding of God can only be as a picture of God. There is some level of information passed on, but so much more than the picture makes the reality. Despite this we have words, have learned words, have been given words as a way to pass on information, to transmit slightly that which has been personally discovered. And words in the hands of a skilled person can, I think, almost have a synergy in them that allows the truth to be revealed. Even the words "It's damnably difficult to paint a taste picture of a potato chip, fat-crisped, salty and chemically flavoured, when first it touches the tip of your tongue. " can resonate with a person and inspire them to actually take notice of the experience when it is occuring; to be more aware. Perhaps the power of words is the handshake that makes way for the relationship. They do not and can not contain the whole, but perhaps they can bring forth a piece or reveal a direction. This could perhaps also be stated as living is learning.

As for experiencing the infinite moment of tasting? Well I wonder were it possible to spend all your time in transendence would it still be transending? Or would it become normative? I think there seems to be some very cyclical and rythmic energies and patterns in our existence. So it would seem more plausible to me to think of steps forwards, moments of, and growth. Even in the thought of eternal some have the idea of the serpent biting it's tale. Which is somewhat related to our sign for infinity yes? Here the concept of without end means that it is interconnected. But another way of looking at eternity as that without end can be to think of it without an end boundary, not that it loops forever, but that it never stops. A continuation forward forever. This seems exciting to me. If life had no challenge would it be as fun? Would it be of as much value? Or is it the things that you choose to work at and do that bring enjoyment? An ever-growing journey without end would have different rewards then one that circled upon itself. But perhaps this too is just two ways of looking at something that is beyond us? Anyhoo it is beyond this life and thus in this life why not still live the best you know how, in openess, and honesty, seeking, searching and being?

I guess, to get back to an earlier schema, I think I could say that I hung my uncertainty on what I believed was a certain faith. And it hung there well. Yet as I explored that which it was hung on I came to the realization that what it hung on was not what I thought it hung on. It is both more and less. And my uncertainty, cares, and worries, hang there still. On what I do not know. Yet I know that they hang. And that's one more piece of knowledge to put in the bank. One more glimpse seen. And that hanging? It is the effect of letting go, of releasing, of trusting, I suppose, that "something more."

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