Monday, February 27, 2006

Some Squirrels Don't Fly

I was just remembering a story told to me by a Cornelson. About a time when they were camping in the woods and they heard odd sounds and upon inspection discovered a squirrel dying on the ground. In the middle of a campsite under some tall trees. So I guess it turns out that sometimes they don't make those crazy jumps. Sometimes it would appear that they meet ground at speed. But they keep jumping from branch to branch, looking graceful and crazy. Despite the apparent danger I don't think they really give it much thought. Not like me.

If I were a squirrel I would probably not be the one launching those crazy gaps. But then again, I'm not a squirrel and there are probably other factors. Like a fear that requires action. Like in Watership Down. Those crazy rabbits. That's one psycho book. Excellent too. Apparently while in the midst of strong emotion things get done that one normally wouldn't consider.

I remember a time when we were camping at Writing On Stone park in southern Alberta and we were playing a game. I don't remember all the rules but it involved running, not getting caught, and hydrosticks (think kick-butt water propelling tubes). Steve was running from someone and so intent on evasion that he jumped this rather large nasty gap onto the top of this hoodoo. He then became aware of his situation. There wasn't enough room on his precarious perch to build enough speed to jump back the way he'd came. Instead he had to launch out and down across a larger gap to get down. Which he did.

He made it. The squirrel didn't. The squirrel probably had more experience but I guess it didn't help. And somehow I admire the squirrel. I admire something in Steve at that time. Perhaps it's the living with abandon. Not being concerned with the consequences. Sometimes that seems pretty cool. Sometimes it seems like to live you need to do stupid things. But I don't really agree with that statement. But there seems to be some sort of life in those moments. Perhaps it's the proximity to death or serious maiming. And perhaps we often feel safe and secure. It's been a long time since I jumped from one branch to another. Actually if I accurately remember my childhood I never did the branch walk high up in the trees where we lived. Crossing from one cedar to another balancing on the branches.

Am I less for it? But I'm alive. But am I alive? I think so.

We live so oblivious to danger. So unaware of our surroundings. We so easily hop into deathcan's and cruise down the road thinking we are safe in our space. Thinking harm will not come to us. I wonder if the squirrel thought, if that's what it'd think?

So much of life is perception. The reality is that we live a finite time in a deadly world. Maybe it would be beneficial if I thought of that more often. Without getting paralyzed by fear or paranoia. Perhaps in our acceptance of "safe" blinders we've surrendered the thrill of living in life. The enjoyment of every moment swallowed in an unconcerned monotony of routine.

So often we think on a horizontal line, a spectrum, between two options. Boring life or Glorious death. The reality is different. There are glorious lives and boring deaths as well. And everything in between and most likely outside of as well.

And mostly we're lazy. As much as we'd like adventure and life it is dangerous and scary and so much easier to do nothing. To let life leech away in half-hour reality tv segments, alternate realities of book and computer. A psuedo-life, a psuedo-adventure, that much like fast food leaves you sitting on the can unsatisfied.

Still something draws me back to that squirrel. I suppose that squirrel lived till it died. It ran and it jumped and it lived. And it fell to it's demise. Unlike the chipmunk. It didn't die falling. It's chubby ass got nailed by a car. I think I'd prefer the fall.

Thursday, February 23, 2006

~Day 3~ Outlook Saskatchewan

So I've arrived. I've survived 2 days of being thrown into a new situation with many unknowns and perhaps I'm starting to figure out a thing or two. I've almost got the names of the guys in the dorm figured out and managed to get it quiet by 12:30 usually. And thus had a few hours of sleep before waking up again. ;)

Things I've discovered so far about Sask..

Dry cold is much nicer than wet cold. -18 here feels like +3 on the coast. So it's not that bad. Though I've still not gone for a walk around here as I've been learning and figuring out institutional realities first.

And today is my first day off. Hence this entry before I go off to have lunch. Yes it costs more than I could do by myself in my suite with odd stove and fridge. But it is very good. Last night we had banana bread for dessert. It was yummy.

Anyhoo.. it's alot for me to take in at the moment of course but really it comes down to these guys are all pretty cool and I think it should be a challenging but great time.


Sunday, February 19, 2006

Home for a rest?

Late friday (Feb 17) I arrived back in Victoria with my father after attending the opening of my brothers art show on Quadra Island. The dog (Cinders) is growling and rolling around on the ground behind me and the cat hair around the house is tickling my nose and tempting my allergy. I'm still warm and cozy (not evening wearing my slippers) from the hot tub earlier this afternoon. It's a good hot tub with a wonderful view over Esquimalt to Victoria and out across the straight to the Olympic Mountains. My oldest younger step brother is going to the washroom next to me. In the washroom that is next to me. And he just got the original Castlevania and Lemmings video games on his mobile phone. Though perhaps it cannot be rightfully called a phone any longer? I suppose it's outgrown that distinction.

Welcome to my today. My sunday in Victoria. Or at least looking down at Victoria.
So I fly out to Saskatchewan shortly. To begin my new job at the Lutheran Collegiate Bible Institute, , as a Dean of Men. It sounds kinda cool. I don't think it comes with a superheroesque costume. I suppose I'll have to bring my own or find one. I fly out on Tuesday.

On Friday I was up on Quadra Island for my brother's Art Show. It was sweet, most enjoyable, and really cool. An amalgam of images and thoughts in his own unique style.

So welcome to my blog, the end of the mass email era, and the start of a new way.